I promise I can't stand it.
All these emotions, flying , rampaging.
I can no longer control any of them.
It is beyond my ability to continue pretending that you don't cause all of this.
You are definitely the one responsible for this awkward feeling.
It's not a bad awkward.
It's similiar to the strangeness when you are intimate with someone for the first time.
Somehow you make it okay to be myself, and in the same moment make me crawl inside my own skin.
You cause me to remember things I had long forgotten.
Feelings surface that I was confident I had safely hidden away.
I'm never sure if I should hate you or thank you.
I swear I despise the way you make me smile.
I dislike the adorable things you say.
I hate how unique and amazing you are.
I loathe you completely and totally.
I'm definitely not even successfully lying to myself, much less anyone else.
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